It is said that we create our own reality. I know this to be true. Whatever we believe will be, is. I should have learned this when I was ten years old, but it took a while for it to sink in. I was always expected to perform in talent shows. I think my mother encouraged this because she had performed as a child. She sang and played the ukulele at church functions and probably for anyone who’d listen. She loved doing that. I, however was not so confident. But a couple of times a year, school or 4-H talent shows would roll around and I was expected to participate. When I was ten, I entered the school talent show. I chose to play a piano piece that was popular at the time – “Last Date” by Floyd Cramer. I practiced and practiced and got it down pretty well. Mother said I should memorize it because it would be more impressive that way. I tried. At home, I could play it all the way through, but I knew I wouldn’t be able to do that on stage. I pleaded with her to let me use my music. She would not give in. The night of the show, I was very nervous of course and tried one last time to convince her that I just could not do it without the music in front of me. I wouldn’t use it, I argued, just have it there in case. Still, she insisted that I could. I knew I couldn’t. I even took the music that night, hoping to slip it onstage without her knowledge, but being the proper stage mother, she was there to escort me on. There were a lot of people in the audience. I walked on that stage knowing that I would not get through the piece, but hoping Mother was right. It started pretty well but there came a point where my fingers just didn’t know what to do next. I froze. Embarrassed beyond belief, I ran off the stage in tears. I was very angry with my mother. She shouldn’t have made me play it from memory when I knew I couldn’t do it. Funny though, all these years later, I can play the piece from memory today. I guess I really did have it memorized. I just believed I didn’t.
Teresa Sue McAdams, co-creator of “Today’s Journey Tarot”, co-author of “Today’s Journey Tarot, A Traveler’s Guide”, co-author of “Tarot Meditations, A Journal for Self Discovery”, and author of “Lessons, The Wisdom Within Each Moment”